I went down to the gay pride parade today. In the smallest way, I felt like a sellout, in that I was technically only there to promote the show that Devon is working on, which I can’t honestly recommend anyone go see. However, I never actually said the words, “Please come see the show,” or anything like that. And I wanted to see the parade. I handed out beads, for the most part. Some of the time I handed out two-for-one coupons to the show. (Again, I never actually encouraged anyone to go see the show. I just handed them the coupons. What they do with those coupons is totally up to them. They can wipe their ass with them for all I care…but they were made of sharp, rigid plastic, so I can’t recommend that either.)

Overall, I’m glad I went and promoted Hats! The Musical, because I was actually able to march in the parade. That’s better than just watching it for many reasons. For one, I still got to see much of the parade in action, because we were all bunched up at the start, so I got to check out the floats. There were a few things I missed, but many more things that I was able to see because of it. The crowd is a show at the gay parade. And there’s a lot more of them on the sidelines than in the parade.

Also, I got to walk in front of TV cameras, which every actor loves, even if it is a cheap shot. And there were people screaming for me to come to them. They hollered, and I hollered back, and they hollered even louder. Grand! Sadly, they just loved me for my beads, but I’m fine with that.

Oh, yes, I learned a new stereotype today: GAY PEOPLE LOVE BEADS.

If you were in my living room, I would turn the lights down low and make you watch the slide show. Unfortunately, we aren’t able to share that experience via the internet, so I will post the slideshow here in this post:

Note - right from the beginning, I knew from our red t-shirts and Melissa Manchester’s *ahem* dress that we would most certainly be the lamest entourage in the entire parade. I was right.

I know. I know.

These guys walked with us. One of them juggled the whole time. Sometimes I juggled with him. The “balls” jokes were made by spectators. It was glorious.

Believe it or not, neither one of these guys is a clown.

It was a black tie affair. All class, all the way.

Other participants included the following:
Space aliens…

Peacocks…


The Mounties…

The Dallas Cowboys, apparently…

The cast of “300″…

Cheerleaders…

a pair of queens (get it?)…

…and this guy, whom I will call “The King of Gay Pride 2007.”

Injuries were minimal.

Even the conservative Christian producer from Texas enjoyed himself. (Note the hat.)

Style was in style.

This is the best faux-hawk I have ever seen.

So. To recap…

Things I lost at the pride parade:
- my soul (temporarily, loaned to Hats! The Musical for the duration of the parade).
- some pocket change.
- a few inconsequential skin cells.

Things I didn’t lose at the pride parade:
- my camera.
- my fingernail (barely).
- my pride.

Things I got from the pride parade:
- lots of photos.
- a red t-shirt.
- a MeTV button.
- a WET Safe Sex Kit
- a “Monitor” sleeve band. Show me your hall pass, mother fucker!
- beads, lots of beads.

If you’ve never gone to a gay pride parade, I would encourage you to do so. The atmosphere is lively and exciting, and there are all kinds of people in funny costumes that don’t mind when you take their picture. Dance music is everywhere, and you’ll most definitely walk away with more beads than you came with. And it is a rare, rare thing to be in a crowd so incredibly large and not worry about pickpockets or drunken assholes looking for a fight. People there are fun, friendly, creative, and they have all kinds of sex advice to offer — but only if you ask for it. It’s a great experience. Trust me.

And, as with any good parade, at the end of the route there was a crazy evangelical shouting “Sick! Sick! Sick! Shame! Shame! Shame!” into a megaphone. But he was so easy to ignore, I actually found it amusing that he was there at all.

Let’s all go to Pride 2008! Who’s with me?

Filed by Bil at 4:36 pm under Gay Agenda