Filed by Trevor at 11:25 pm under Activism, Catholicism, Gay Agenda, Humanism, Love, Sex Ed
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This evening I attended Chicago Opera Vanguard’s second annual AIDS Quilt Songbook, which not only functions as a valuable fundraiser for outreach programs in the city, but is also a fantastic exhibition of local composers and performers. To boot, this year’s concert was held at Center on Halsted, which was an even more appropriate venue and didn’t require schlepping down to Hyde Park again. Bonus.
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Filed by Bil at 1:25 pm under Damn Hippies, Love, Social Issues
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This World AIDS Day, I called in sick to the office. I don’t have AIDS, I just happen to be under the weather.

While I can’t do much about the syndrome itself, seeing as how I am not a research scientist, I can at least raise awareness and encourage prevention education.

Here’s how I do that:

Please read this article on World Aids Day 2009 from NPR’s news blog, The Two-Way. The article contains a brilliant summation of the current world AIDS situation from UNAIDS executive director Michel Sidibe.

If you’re too lazy to read the article, I’ll reprint the summation here, with some parts in bold (courtesy of me, because I like them):

On this World AIDS Day we are filled with both hope and concern.

Hope because significant progress has been made towards universal access. New HIV infections have dropped. Fewer children are born with HIV. And more than 4 million people are on treatment.

Concern because 28 years into the epidemic the virus continues to make inroads into new populations; stigma and discrimination continue to undermine efforts to turn back the epidemic. The violation of human rights of people living with HIV, women and girls, men who have sex with men, injecting drug users and sex workers must end.
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Filed by Lance at 2:05 pm under General, Social Issues
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I’ve always liked Fall. I don’t like hot temperatures, for one thing, and I love seasons. I’m not talking about a slight increase in average precipitation, either. I mean, gimme 100 degree swings between snow (I love snow) and that other season when I wish there were snow (I love snow). The colors, little kids running around in adorable costumes, cider, fireplaces, and everything else make it all the better.
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Filed by Bil at 2:27 pm under Fightin' Words, Politics, Social Issues
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Now that “Reading Rainbow” is done, what does the future look like? I’m worried because it wasn’t one of those things that fulfilled a specific basic human need. It’s not like it was the only pizza delivery company around; but if it was, you know damn well somebody else would pick up the torch. If there’s one thing that binds us all, liberal or conservative, Republican or Democrat, it’s the same — we all want our pizza brought right to our front door.
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Filed by Bil at 11:22 pm under Homophobia, Politics
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Who is this guy and where did he come from?

Congressman Patrick J. Murphy - Rep. Patrick Murphy, Veterans Announce Efforts to Repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”

I’m appalled by “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” but I am neither gay nor in the military, so it’s easy not to listen to me. Here’s a congressman who, while not gay, actually was in the military and, in fact, was in Iraq and earned a Bronze Star for being awesome. He’s an elected official from some blue-collar district in Pennsylvania. These facts – because he’s a decorated Iraq vet, because he’s from a socially conservative district, and because he’s NOT gay – make him perhaps the least likely and the best advocate for getting rid of a stupid, small-minded policy that directly affects our national security.

And don’t get me wrong. I am not one of those guys who goes around worrying about national security. It’s a political potato, and something I find boring after two seconds. But seriously, what’s a bigger threat: having gays in the military or having a military with 13,000 fewer individuals? Think about that one.

And keep your eye on Pat Murphy. He’s a mover and a shaker.

Filed by Bil at 11:13 am under Pop Culture, Social Issues, The Media
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Note of contention: I have been trying to post this article for over a week now, but something was wrong with our Word Press editor software. Yes. Technical problems with the website prevented me from posting an article titled “Websites are the future”…anyway, here it is, in all last week’s glory…

I’m going to write this article with three points that seemingly have nothing to do with each other, starting with:

1) Pay for what you get.

If you don’t give money to Chicago Public Radio, here’s what you have to look forward to. Or, if you don’t listen to Chicago Public Radio, it’s what you have to look forward to hearing me talk about.

You don’t want that, do you?

Give $20 at WBEZ.org

Speaking of websites being the future…

2) Make the most of a dire situation.
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Filed by Bil at 8:04 pm under Shameless Plugs, Social Issues, The Arts
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Before I begin, one more shameless plug before our fervid string of one-night-only events comes to a close:
Staged reading - “Agamemnon” by Jeremy Menekseoglu
Monday, April 27 - 8 PM

Now then.

Less than a week after The Game of Contact happened, which inspired me to get up and go, go, go, I feel like I need a vacation from it again. But it’s only because today I have a headache, which may very well be a symptom of not enough sleep at night. I’ve been getting plenty of sleep, but this weekend most of it has been during daylight hours.
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Filed by Trevor at 12:05 am under Activism, Humanism, Shameless Plugs, Social Issues
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Rather than carry on the way I normally do and preface this entry with loads of backstory and ancillary details that relate in no way to anything else, I’ll be direct: in just over a month I will begin six months of training for the Chicago AIDS Marathon to be held on October 11th, and along the way I will also be participating in the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s Out of the Darkness Overnight Walk. This is hugely out of character for me and I’m absolutely terrified, but paradoxically this is precisely why I have confidence this is the path I need to take.
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Filed by Bil at 10:47 pm under General, Social Issues
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It occurred to me a couple of hours ago that I put up a post on this blog earlier today that had nothing to do with something that happened to me and everything to do with other people. It’s a postitive-energy open letter to people who complain online about a reality TV show. I put that up instead of my amazing anecdote about what actually happened in real life, involving me directly. So never mind them now. Here’s what happened to me this morning…
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Filed by Trevor at 12:46 am under Depression, Love
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I have much to forgive myself for, and much more for others to forgive. The trouble is, I have no assurances of the latter, and without it, can never achieve the former.

I had originally titled this entry “Starting to Heal”, but I no longer feel this is appropriate for me. Until now I thought that healing my wounds was a solitary process, revisiting one-by-one those events that left me so damaged, then inwardly making peace with those responsible. But in these past few weeks I’ve taken a good hard look at just what others have done that have left me feeling so hurt and betrayed, and it’s really begun to sink in that the reason why I have been unable to let so much of it go is because I have inflicted such hurt and betrayal on others. Nothing is so unkind as a mirror.

It’s a nice idea to think that all of the growing up I’ve had to do in my adult life has left me with a greater sense of peace and satisfaction; perhaps it has to some degree, but rather than this I like to think that my circumstances have shown me the responsibility of total honesty. I say responsibility because I see now that a truly honest life requires assessing the truth and acting on it, and the truth for me at the moment is I cannot move forward without facing the consequences of my actions past and present and doing everything I can to undo them. Or, failing that, to atone for them.

Where once was hubris now lingers crippling self-doubt. So much, in fact, that I have been virtually unable to write music for nearly six years or even commit to making steady entries on this blog. And I’m now beginning to think that my self-doubt is rooted in deep remorse and shame for what I see as stains on my past. I don’t wish to rewrite history because I think it’s pointless to wish for something so impossible. What I do wish, however, is to be able to reconnect with those to which I have done such harm and to replace those memories with new ones. And it’s all I can do to hope for something that may as well be equally impossible.

Honesty requires action, so I have acted. And now I will wait. Perhaps this is not enough to mend my self-doubt completely, perhaps this is not enough for me to forgive myself totally, and I know for certain that this is not enough to achieve peace. But if this first step is successful, I am more than willing to make the journey.